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So I think in any love relationship, there would be a few key components and
maybe apply the SSLD model to it.
That would be a cognitive aspect, like we will have a certain
script characterization of what it is, how do we make sense of this?
And one of the things that most people would recognize as
important in love relationship is mutual understanding and knowledge, all right?
So do I know this person?
Do I understand this person?
So I think that probably is one dimension that's important.
The other dimension is emotional, right?
So when we talk about love, we probably do not
count connections or relationships
that are sort of like void of emotional investment or feelings, right?
And if we talk about someone being cold and distant, we somehow think
that this is not really love even if it is in an intimate relationship or family relationship.
If someone is not emotionally invested,
we probably would be even questioning like, does this person really love me? You know.
So I think some form of emotional investment would be necessary.
And then obviously, we go through these major domains in the SSLD paradigm,
and one of the things that we'll be asking is like, okay, so is love motivated?
[LAUGH] What is driving this love, right? >> right.
And so some people may be looking for a sense of intimacy, sharing, affiliation.
Some people will be looking for a way to validate oneself, to prove oneself.
So people will be seeking out
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gratification of different needs in the love relationship.
So yeah,
I just want to see whether you have also learned something about the SSLD model.
So I've talked about cognition, emotion, and motivation.
So what are the other domains do you remember?
[LAUGH] >> [LAUGH] I don't.
No...Is like physical >> [LAUGH]
has a big part of that? >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, the body, yeah.
So we can talk about the body, but we probably would have some opportunity
to go into what some other people would think when they think physical.
Some people will think about, okay, physical as in physical sex, which is
obviously is one part of it, but I think we actually have a broader understanding.
A good example would be you know, like parent-child relationship,
especially during early stages of life, like during infancy, you know.
The baby's experience of love is sort of like
mediated mainly through the body if the baby is
like cuddled a lot and feeding
all these like tactile holding and then all that, we found that it's
very important in developing healthy attachment behaviour, right?
So yeah, the body obviously plays an important role.
And now, when we are paying more attention to physical
changes associated with aging, then we can also be looking
at how the aging body receives or expresses affection.
So obviously, the body is important, and then obviously,
we can also be talking about physical sex as well.
>> Right, what about environment?
Does environment impact love a lot too?
>> I think, yeah, that physical environment probably would
impact on people's behaviour, love behaviour.
If we're talking about a situation in which there is not enough food to go by,
Then I think people would develop survival strategies that would allow small
units to be very close to each other.
And then, we can also see that you know, this competition or
struggle to survival would be given more weight.
And then, the other thing that we think of and we talk about in the environment,
of course, is the culture and social reality or political reality.
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I somehow can think of some very unusual situations in human history.
Like in China, for instance, during the Cultural Revolution,
there's a very sort of unusual political reality historically.
And people negotiate relationship, or love relationship very often with regard
to its political implication because you need to in order to survive politically.
And if you are dating the wrong person,
Then that's considered a political mistake.
It can actually bring very destructive consequences to yourself and
the other person. >> Yeah.
So that would be like a very unusual example.
But then, even when we're talking about ordinary, everyday life,
if there is such a thing, then we can see that you know culture,
social scripts that we talked about earlier in this course, also play an important role.
>> Definitely.
So social cultural realities are also important, so you're right.
So that probably take us to the last domain that is important, and
to a lot of people, that is the most important part of love.
Is what you actually do?
Yeah, and I think you know like from the
SSLD perspective, we do emphasize what you do is important.
Because if you can say, I love you, I love you, and then do nothing, all right,
sometimes love can be articulated or actually most effectively
articulated by what you actually do, right?
>> Yeah And you know, care-giving, doing something for
the other person.
A. Ka Tat TsangFounder of the SSLD System; Professor and Factor-Inwentash Chair in Social Work in the Global Community
